New Year's Eve

Alrighty, peeps. Maybe I'm aging and if so, I don't really care, but it's 9:40p, we had a great dinner, some nice champagne and wine, and now are off to watch a movie in PJs. I feel satisfied. Completely. And I will be in bed well before midnight, and that's great too.

We had toasted baguette with thyme pesto and preserved lemon crème fraîche, steak fajitas, roasted fennel and potatoes with radicchio, endive and bagna cauda (ridiculous sauce made of anchovies, capers, garlic, lemon, butter and olive oil), and in the fridge lies in wait a chocolate-caramel-hazelnut tart. Mamma mia. I'm stuffed! T is chugging water and we're just happy the boys are in bed.

Honest to god, they killed me today. During bath time I imposed monetary fines on them starting then for 1) purposefully dissolving their bath soap in their bath water ($2), 2) using the words butt, crack, fart, hole, tongue, lick and several others anymore (25 cents per transgression), 3) general rudeness, especially in the form of not listening and basic cleaning when asked (25 cents per transgression), and 4) NO dessert or gifts until I see wildly improved behavior.

"But Mom, at my old school, I LOVED the puppet theater, so I NEED one in my room."

A likely story I say. "And no puppet theater for you!"

I had such big and hopeful plans for Em-i-lis 2013 Year in Review as well as Predictions for 2014 pieces for you tonight, but the children beat me to a pulp, and this is all I can manage. Also, the dentist mentioned something about a pulpectomy or some such shit for Jack's unclean 7 year old mouth, but that kid needs to pony up with better behavior before we go on with pulp crap that costs a fortune.

So, in the meantime, I wish you all the happiest and healthiest and best-ever of years as 2014 reaches you. If you're a parent in any way to anyone, I wish you patience and godspeed. Also R&R whenever possible, even if you have to plead or pay for it.

Remember:

• if you chew gum, don't smack it with an open mouth;
• if you're wearing tight and/or white pants, please check your rearview via trusty mirror or human source before leaving your home;
• be kind because you don't know what others are dealing with;
• that said, stand up for yourself because usually, people can do more;
• write thank-you  notes, seriously!
• let things go if you can or if it's warranted (that includes to-dos, "friendships", piles of unread "I swear I'm getting to thems", etc;
• give, thank, love;
• be nice to Mother Earth;
• listen to and/or read an old, amazing speech, like the Gettysburg Address.

Happy New Year!

Not so hot 24, but good times a'comin!

I was not particularly zen when we reached home yesterday. Granted, the boys were good on the flight, but the morning had been harried, the flight was awfully turbulent at least 50% of the time AND Oliver melted down every two minutes about something so inane that I wanted to disown him. Jack threw a tantrum at bedtime because he was "NOT tired" which really means he's exhausted, Nutmeg threw up twice, and I hit the sack at 8p. The best part of the day was seeing Nutmeg, pukey though he was. This morning sucked the big one, and then I schlepped both boys to the dentist where we found, unsurprisingly, that Jack has two cavities. He has the worst dental hygiene of any child I've known, so frankly I think this is an obvious and good consequence from which he'll learn. Fortunately, both cavities are in baby teeth, but I think the old drill will teach him a lesson or two.

Afterwards I made the profoundly bad decision to take both kids to the market with me. Not only was all of DC there too but also the kids literally talked me into insanity. I was shaking on the drive home during which I called T, told him to be waiting outside to help bring in the groceries and plan to take the boys away from me until he goes to the gym at 4:30.

I ate a quick lunch from one of last night's take-out containers, left my phone at home and hauled my riddled ass to the Bloomingdales shoe department for some retail therapy on the cheap via the post-Xmas sale. Two pairs of fabulous shoes for insanely good prices. And then the most spectacular pleated leather skirt that was not on sale but which I convinced the spunky salesgal to sell me at 30% + $75 off. Who won? Moi. I am now going to the gym, a bottle of champagne is chilling, and I intend to have a lovely NYE here at home with my hubs and NOT the children who will be sawing logs. Amen!

Heading home

What a fantastic ten days in Louisiana! Heading home, eager to detox and get back to cooking and a more sustainable schedule, but it was all great fun, and the kids had as much fun as did we.Last night, El, Michele, T and I went to The Columns, an old, awesome, grand hotel-now-bar on St. Charles avenue, for drinks. It was perfect and we then returned home to cook dinner and crack a bottle of red. Michele's pasta made me want to cry it was so good. It's awesome to love your sister and her husband so much!