What a day- good, great, fun, exhausting, wine

I swear to you that joining the gym was a great decision on behalf on my psyche. Whee! And I gotta say that the negotiating was empowering. A dear reader, Courtney, encouraged me to run, not walk, from the gym after the encouragement to be dishonest, and I totally hear you. If this weren't a high-end-type place AND I didn't think she was just trying to be cool, I would have. But her behavior actually made me feel ever ballsier so I think it's going to work out. Seeing Jack's former teacher, now Oliver's teacher, was just so awesome. She and her co-teachers are such warm, wonderful women, and I'm really looking forward to a great year. Oliver was so excited, and I think Jack loved visiting his old haunt.

Went to the playground for a while, read 9 books, went out to dinner, saw some old friends and the boys were in bed at 5:55p. I am not kidding. Oliver was up at 4am and Jack and I were up for an hour during the night. So, they are pooped and sleeping soundly. I will too.

For now, I'm enjoying some yummy wine and gearing up to caramelize the fennel -and some oranges!- in Ouzo, toss up a celeriac remoulade and figure out some sort of protein- maybe farmers market sausages for T and a salmon burger for me? Making salmon burgers is SO easy. Have y'all done this? Using a meat grinder, or a nice sharp knife, grind/finely dice best-quality salmon. Put it in a bowl with spinach (either defrosted or, if fresh, wilted), salt, pepper, and a solid dose of feta cheese. Grill or freeze. Delish!

Why it's always good to ask

6 months = a deal! Go me. :)

Negotiating

It never ceases to amaze me how difficult negotiating can be. I'm not at all afraid to seek information -where did you get that? can i buy/make that? what's possible/etc- but to negotiate is different, almost fraught at times. We went to the gym, the boys did great in the kids' club, I felt great being there, it's lovely, but I don't really want to commit for a year...yet. The salesy guilt is unreal- "you shouldn't feel bad for taking "me" time; you deserve this; it's really our policy to have you commit for 12 months", etc. Who's the one who'll be paying the bills, friend? But I bucked it up and asked if she could speak with her manager regarding a 6 month commitment vs 12. Oh, and she then suggested that I ask a friend or my mother-in-law to take a bill for me one month to prove that I'd relocated which would enable me to void my contract. AS IF. I said, "I am not remotely comfortable doing something like that as it smacks of weaselly dishonesty."I'm still waiting to hear back, and while I don't feel that I did the slightest bit of anything wrong by asking, I'm left with a slightly elevated cortisol level and anticipating the call back.

I suspect negotiations are, generally speaking, harder for women. Tom showed me a speech given recently by Sheryl Sandberg, the #2 at Facebook. She talked about the ways in which women sometimes undermine themselves without meaning to- through behaviors that are considered meek or because they undersell themselves or demand too little. I think simply speaking up with assertiveness, pushing back on information or situations is just too uncomfortable for many women, even if they're confident, competent, sharp gals. I would certainly consider myself those things yet I had to gear up to some extent to push back on this dumb membership commitment.

It's interesting to consider. In the meantime, I'll keep you posted.