31 March 2020: some humor, more of the other

How in god’s name is it still March? And no, Jack’s money was not returned. :(

I regularly dislike Alexa; even when I turn her off, I am certain she is listening, and the other day I told her to play a famous Queen song, and she played a flipping COVER of it. Almost unforgivable. But this is a solid, and I’ll give her points:

“Alexa, who is the worst president ever?”

Thank you, Elan.

Lotta sent me another hilarious gem: Heading to the hairdresser after quarantine.

And this production by a family of six is inspired!

I gotta say that I continue to be desperately sad and appalled by the way Agent Orange Shitweasel is handling Covid-19. Perhaps you saw the field hospital being set up in Central Park right now. For some reason, that image just gutted me today. I mean, America is one of the wealthiest, most advanced countries in the world, and some our of citizens will die in a tent in a park in the year 2020.

Perhaps also you saw this:

So, yeah. Where are the tests? Where is the protective gear for our frontline workers? Why are Florida’s and Mississippi’s governors and Liberty University’s president and way too many red state, right wing, evangelical people listening to trump rather than scientists and refusing to act in ways that protect their citizens, students, congregants, neighbors, and peers? It’s terrifying, selfish, and gross. It is deplorable. It’s evil. And it comes from the top, from the shameful “leader” we are being weakened by. We need to vote out so many people in November. Please support Blue efforts in all ways that you can.

27 March 2020: Daily Humor

Today was just what the doctor ordered. It was GORGEOUS! To the point where I ultimately got to wear shorts AND a short-sleeved t-shirt and garden for hours and hours. I gave away many hostas as well as some raspberry canes and butternut squash seedlings. I mulched and weeded and saw neighbors from appropriate distances and the kids played outside, and it was so nice.

Y’all are doing a GREAT job staying sane, keeping in touch, laughing, and sending me good material for the daily laugh track.

Humor:

Y’all, this dog is KILLING ME. I nearly lost my breath and bladder outside today whilst viewing it for the first time. Thank you, Susan.

Fred for the win! Thank you, Anne.

Thank you, Lotta.

In Resistance news, we need more of this:
(From, John Kerry & Walton, KY, mayor, Gabe Brown, respectively).

And don’t forget to wash your hands!!

Covid-19, schools' out, Pi Day, Ol's birthday

Good gracious, y’all! 2020 has been a hell of a dumpster fire-gully washer so far.

Discover & share this Fire GIF with everyone you know. GIPHY is how you search, share, discover, and create GIFs.

Discover & share this Fire GIF with everyone you know. GIPHY is how you search, share, discover, and create GIFs.

Discover & share this Dumpster GIF with everyone you know. GIPHY is how you search, share, discover, and create GIFs.

You get my drift?! I mean, the orange stain has been impeached, more than 7,800 Americans have been killed or injured by a gun, Devin Nunes continues to file baseless lawsuits ad nauseam, and the world is being besieged by the coronavirus. The entire country of Italy, where my sister and her family live, is shut down, school systems and companies around the globe have closed for varying amounts of time (my boys’ school will reopen 4/13 at the earliest, and Tom is home for at least two weeks), but our ridiculous excuse for a leader continues to lie and endanger America’s public health.

South Korea has drive-through testing that accommodates 200,000 people a day, Turkey has hundreds of thousands more tests than we do, and folks landing in Haiti are tested immediately upon disembarking the plane. Meanwhile, Americans are left wondering what tests are and where and how do you get them if you’re not a Congressional Republican or Mar-a-Lago barnacle.

At least we’re having an early spring thanks to right-wingers around the world refusing to deal with climate change. Gadzooks! We are all housebound, there is no Kleenex to be found in stores* (seriously, I tried two different stores this afternoon as Oliver is sick and used 4 boxes of tissues before 4p today and struck out completely), and even the kids wonder if distance learning will work, but boy howdy, I wore shorts and worked in the yard for 5 hours today, so there’s that. #winning

Discover & share this Bam Yes GIF with everyone you know. GIPHY is how you search, share, discover, and create GIFs.

*In perhaps an odd sign of end times, there are also no turnips to be found. Two stores, no turnips. I mean, I love turnips, but I didn’t realize I had so much company. Is this shortage because St. Patty’s Day is Tuesday?

But life goes on, and so do we. Ol has a shitty virus but he is a darling lamb and will be ok (hopefully by the time he turns 11 on Tuesday), Jack is using this break as a grand opportunity to get new lawn care clients and earn money, and we are living as if it’s all a mighty vacation. Ice cream at 2p? Sure. A movie every night? You bet. A pie for Pi Day? Duh.

apple pi

In the grand scheme of things, we remain infinitely fortunate. If you feel that way too, consider donating to or volunteering with local food banks (I’ve just given to DC’s Capital Area Food Bank and registered to join the Special Response Task Force of my county bank, Manna Food Center), to public school lunch programs as many kids rely heavily on the meals they eat at school, and to your own micro communities. My neighborhood listserv abounds with offers to help older or disabled neighbors by grocery shopping, picking up prescriptions, walking dogs, tending yards, and so forth.

And don’t forget to laugh. This video is hilarious.