Heirlooms

Perhaps you remember the post I wrote in July of 2012 just after we returned from the service honoring the life and passing of Tom's paternal grandmother. She had died a few months prior but wished to be cremated and then be celebrated at a party. I found this spirit to be spectacular! The morning we were all to leave, we went to Grandma's house, and I was lucky to get to take many of her kitchen items home, including beautiful champagne coupes, a potato masher, some sheet pans and so on. I use much of what I brought back on a regular basis! Anyway, when Jack and I went home for Nanny's funeral last month, I similarly spent time on my last day there poking through Nanny's kitchen cabinets. I think because I had been so close to her and her death was still so new, going through her things was a much heavier experience than was going through Grandma's. I almost felt like a thief defiling a sacred space. You might recall that I mentioned her Saltines tin and shared a picture of it with you. The oval roaster, her canning funnel, an old menu-making guide from her and Papa's restaurant... fingering those items brought back so many memories; each of them is imbued with such history.

Today I opened a large, carefully wrapped box from my mom and found inside all of these items and more. I adore this green and white Pyrex mixing bowl, and this 10" springform pan helped make innumerable cheesecakes over the years during which Nanny cooked. My dad loved her cherry cheesecake, and she used to make him one for his birthday each year. The rounded-corner pan was the one in which she made her refrigerator sheet cakes, and she had such a collection of old -really vintage now!- ornaments (see Santa in there?).

I have missed Nanny regularly since she died; her absence has been like a low-grade fever I can't shake. I have thought many times about how different Christmas in Louisiana will be this year without her home to spend Christmas Eve in, Nanny in her recliner, the Queen of it all. But I have my memories and now I have these physical memories too. Each time I use the pan or the funnel or hang Santa on our tree, another image of her will sweep through my mind. I hope I'll remember to pause and enjoy the reel slowly, helping the pictures stick for good.

Yummy kinda-Carbonara pasta

Well, the eggs are in the pasta (homemade, freshly rolled) but the cream and bacon are saucing this puppy up. Plus kale, a leek, scallions, black olives, lots of Parm... Umami was everywhere; we liked it!

Let's give a huzzah to Pope Francis! Did you see that beautiful photo of him embracing the disfigured man in Vatican City this week? The man has a genetic disease which causes tons of painful tumors to grow all over his face, neck and head (whole body? not sure), and the Pope's hug was the picture of christian grace. Walking the walk, this man is!

Nasty night leads to better things

Y'all, last night was the absolute worst. A pox on that flu shot! I woke up at 2:00 am on the precipice of full-scale puke, feverishly chilly, shaking and sweating concurrently. For nearly two hours, I just huddled under my comforter, shivering and increasingly wet and trying not to bother T. I think my chills woke him up though because he offered to get Advil, and I said "yes, please." It helped some, and I got back to sleep for a couple hours. When I awoke, I felt as if I were on another planet, and good god almighty, you should have seen my hair. I looked like a wilting Medusa. Ugly!

A few hours later, a good pal came over so I could teach her how to make Nanny's cranberry sauce. It was so nice to spend time together in such a way, not least because we talked without being interrupted the whole time. After she left, I made my own batch and then boogied to school to help sketch the background set for the second grade play. My adobe buildings were better than my forest. Fortunately, my friend, C, was there too, and her pines were totally redemptive. At one point I looked at us, spread out on huge, bright blue, taped-together paper, and thought bemusedly, "we are two very well-educated women, and here we are on a floor, sketching a Native American backdrop at 2pm on a Thursday and kinda stressing about proportion and scale." You just never know where life will take you. It was fun frankly.

Back home, and Ol and I made vanilla fig scones for a breakfast I'm hosting tomorrow. I need to get on the cherry-spelt scone bandwagon too, but first there is the pasta (made the dough an hour ago) I need to roll out and the underlying nausea (still!) with which I must deal.

Who joins me in a shout-out to the Senate for passing the Employment Non-Discrimination Act today?? Finally, it is illegal to discriminate when hiring on the basis of gender identity or sexual orientation. And we've got marriage equality in IL! Yee-haw!

**PS- now taking orders for holiday-time Cranberry Sauce!