Oliver and I clutched each other’s hands this afternoon as we waited for the verdict in the George Floyd-Derek Chauvin trial to be read by the judge. Jack texted from crew practice to check in. The original estimation was that we’d hear between 3:30 and 4, but as the minutes ticked past 4, 4:15, we got antsy. A friend told me that Minneapolis had released kids early from school and was trying to make sure all were home, should the verdict not go the way of justice.

That’s heartbreaking, really. On so many levels.

Suddenly, the CNN talking heads segued to the courtroom. Oliver and I squeezed our bound hands so tightly that they began to sweat.

Count 1: 3rd degree murder.

Guilty.

Count 2: 2nd degree murder.

Guilty.

Count 3: 2nd degree manslaughter.

Guilty.

All the while, Chauvin’s eyes darted from jury to judge and back again. That murderous bastard in his baby blue tie.

Guilty on all three counts. Ol and I hugged. I texted Jack who was enormously relieved.

And THEN the judge revoked bail and remanded Chauvin to jail. As he was led out of the courtroom in handcuffs, texts from friends began pouring in-“Thank god.” “Finally.” “Thank the lord.”- and I started to cry. Soft tears of gratitude for this bit of accountability. For the bit of peace or closure it might provide Floyd’s family, his friends, his community, Minneapolis, a city that is still reeling from Floyd’s murder in May of 2020 and from Daunte Wright’s murder just last week, also at the hands of police.

Earlier today, I was in the car and got to listen to most of this excellent 1A episode about the Chauvin trial. It’s worth your time. The stats on police violence are staggering, and the point made that even though we all watched, too many times, as Chauvin killed Floyd over those interminable 9 minutes and 27 seconds, the outcome of the trial remained unclear up to the end is a terrible indictment on the racism in America and the way it persists and poisons everything, including our system of “justice” and those who are tasked with protecting and serving us.

This case should have been a slam dunk. Black Americans should not have to hold out hope for brave teenagers to record murders on their phones in order to get justice. Chauvin has been held accountable, and rightly so. But too many aren’t, and so real justice remains elusive. We must keep fighting.

And, if you didn’t hear Minnesota AG Keith Ellison’s statement after the verdict was read and Chauvin taken away, please do. It’s superb.