The keepers of household safety

Jack is dressed as Spider-Man. Oliver is an astronaut. Both are armed with toy pistols. Apparently, our house is full of evil; bad guys and dangerous elements abound. They just swept the upstairs and declared it safe. As they wandered into the living room where I am happily reading the paper in silence, I said it sounded like some kind of trouble was brewing in the basement. Jack said, "it's dangerous." Oliver said, "always cock!" They descended the stairs and invaded. I laughed so hard I wheezed.