I am really tired, friends. And I'm riding the crest of my second big wave of sadness. I've just tried to be of help since we arrived -running errands, cooking, cleaning, trying to comfort- but I'm alone in the house right now, and the sadness is heavy and hard to bear. The casket Nanny chose is a wooden one lined in pale pink satin, and somewhere in it is a small drawer for notes or treasures family members wish to send with her. Ol and Jack each drew pictures (Ol's is Snow White minus hair; Jack said that because Nanny was never able to see one of his baseball games, he thought he'd show her what a scene from one looked like, plus some hearts and kissing lips and such); I think they're very dear. T and I each wrote letters, and I know that when I slip these into the drawer, it will be hard to shut it.
Mom and her sisters said the funeral home did a wonderful job of making Nanny look beautiful and peaceful; they even dyed her hair back to the right color which I know she would be thrilled about. Today is the visitation and rosary, tomorrow the mass and funeral. Tomorrow evening I hope to make dinner for everyone, including Nanny's lemon fluff pie.